(ch. 19 up) God Put a Smile Upon Your Face

[jill]

starsar1inabillion said:

your writing is simply amazing.

simply amazing.

Aw, wow, thank you!

[jill]

wow...so i guess noones reading this anymore?

[blue-eyed struck]

I am!

This chapter was beautifully written! You could really envision the environment around her! I also find it fascinating how slowly by slowly, Riley is gaining control of all her thoughts and emotions. Before, she only cared about Paul whom she actually had relations with, whereas with Riley, it was only a brief encounter on the plane! I'm curious to know what was going through Riley's head when she was jogging past him! Please post again Jill.

[Shelly]

yess we are! you just need to put up more chapters.

[jill]

i know i know.

maybe a new one tonight.

[jill]

This isn't a new chapter (new one's almost done) but I edited the first chapter a little so everyone can get a better idea of where this story's going.

Chapter 1

Ashley's tiny frame shook feverishly next to Paul's in the backseat of the police car. The snow was thick and fluffy outside in the dark, and it was tensely silent except for the inappropriately dramatic crescendo of a piano version of "Carol of the Bells" playing on the car's surprisingly expensive stereo system. His arm was wrapped around her; he was close to her now, the only one who could comfort her. He had been waiting for this since the moment he first saw her, hadn't he? He hadn't realized it in the beginning, but in retrospect, isn't it what he had wanted all along? He decided that from then on he’d be more careful about what he wished for.

He reached over and touched her face. It was hot, still wet with tears, and she didn't move. Her head hung low; she looked so ashamed. Paul wanted to tell her it wasn't her fault, that she was forced into it; but, he had never been in her situation, so he didn't feel it was appropriate to try to tell her how to feel. He couldn't imagine the horror of being raped. She hadn't spoken to him yet, but he had started to piece everything together, and he felt responsible. He worked out the motives, the cause of everything in his head, let himself explore his suspicions, and to his own disgust things made the most sense in the scenario he had the hardest time believing. This would all feel so much more real if it wasn't really a rape at all. He turned to the young girl, trying to look into her face, so maybe he could draw some logic out of these thoughts. She ignored him, though, still in shock. He needed to go back to the beginning, to remember how this all started. He stared out the window, and remembered.

---

Three men, somewhere in their twenties or thirties, walked along the Santa Monica state beach on a low-key kind of day. It was late July, and they subtly watched bikinis as they chatted and sipped at their Miller Lights.

“sh*t, Paul,” Josh, his brother, said. “I can’t believe you’re getting married. Crazy.”

“Yup,” Paul sighed, staring out at the shoreline ahead of them.

“Hey, at least it got him to come out here, though,” said his best friend Drew.

“Oh come on, you know I fly over here whenever I can,” Paul chuckled. “I miss this place.”

“You know what else you’re gonna miss,” Josh growled mischievously under his breath, glancing over at a nearby group of sunbathing girls.

The two other guys lowered their sunglasses and quickly looked to see what Josh was talking about. The girls looked young, maybe early twenties at the oldest. Their toned bodies and long, brown limbs were what had originally made them stand out, but Paul was drawn to one girl in particular. She looked so natural, as if the sun had lightened her hair and darkened her skin over the years until they were the same tawny hue. He knew he would have to look away soon if he didn’t want to get caught staring, but he couldn’t help himself. Her friends alerted her to the guys’ attention, and she casually pushed her huge sunglasses to the crown of her head and gave him a genuine smile. It wasn’t a forced smile that embarrassed him, or a $l*tty smile that he so often got from girls who tried too hard; just a plain old friendly smile. He almost laughed to himself, because of course- as if she wasn’t perfect enough- she also had full cheekbones and blindingly white teeth. He quietly swore to himself; not because he felt like an arsehole for blatantly devouring eye candy while he was engaged, but because he knew he had to have this girl, even if only once.

Thanks to seonedevinian for proofreading!

Comments, please.

[Shelly]

oh my! well this changes things alittle bit.

[jill]

oh yes, it does.

new chapter. thx to seonedevinian for proofreading!!!

Chapter 19

The wind seemed to take her wispy body away as soon as it had come. Riley let out the air he had been holding so tensely in his lungs and watched her run away, away, away. Apparently he had lost her for good, which is what he had set out to do. It was what needed to be done. He repeated this in his mind over and over; anything to convince himself that she was just a pretty girl and nothing more. His face still burned, his fists still clenched, the pit of his stomach still twisted. No matter how many times he justified everything; there was still that underlying regret. He wondered if somehow, some way, he could earn the respect of the faculty and still keep her. Until he found that way, though, he wouldn't let himself risk it.

Not paying attention to the direction he was facing, he released his frustration on the soccer ball he had been kicking around. It soared off towards the school, just as an expensive looking SUV pulled into the parking lot. Riley cringed as the ball collided with the vehicle, barely missing the window. He jogged over and saw that the impact had left an impressive dent in the vehicle's door. The driver got out of the car and walked around to see what had happened. Riley recognized him immediately. His face seared as he realized where they had met; it was his neighbor in the hotel, the tall man who had made Ashley scream loud enough to interrupt Riley's sleep.

"sh*t," the man said under his breath, observing the car.

"Damn, sorry 'bout that," Riley said, walking up to him. "Didn't see yeh coming."

"Nice kick," six-foot-four said, chuckling. "What team you on?"

"I'm the coach," Riley said.

"Sorry bud. You look young-"

"I know, thank you," Riley cut him off. He was so used to hearing it, so sick of hearing it. He was pretty, boyish, doll-like; he'd gotten it all. "So, I'll just give you my information, then? So you can let me know how much to pay you for the damage?"

"Sure," the man said, starting to root around in his car for a pen and paper. His earnestness annoyed Riley; he realized that the man was wealthy enough that he didn’t need Riley’s money, but he’d take it anyway so as not to offend him. "Hey, would you want to come inside with me for a second? I don't have a pen or my phone on me, sorry."

"Alright then," Riley sighed, reluctant. "I'll meet you at the front office." The man agreed and drove off to park. Riley hurried to the office, wondering if this was more than a coincidence. First Ashley, now the guy who had made her so guilty? It was a small world, but not that small. Or maybe it was. Riley walked into the front office and started to scrawl his name and phone number on a small pad of paper. The man walked in soon after, speaking to the dean. Riley smiled politely and handed him the paper. The man's conversation with the dean had sparked his interest- who was this guy? Maybe he wasn't just Ashley's lover; did he work here?

"Sorry again," Riley said. "So, what do you do here? I'm new, I don't really know anybody."

"You're not alone, bud. First year teaching here- social science," the man said, offering his hand to shake. "Paul."

"I'm Riley. Nice to meet you," he said, shaking the hand of the man who had taken his job. They had given it to this guy instead of him? Riley observed him, critical. He was preppy, with his neat corduroys and forest green sweater. He was obviously wealthy, and Riley sensed he was a laid-back, good guy. He was undeniably likeable, but he didn't seem like an intellectual. Riley was unimpressed, and started to build castles in the air about Paul losing his job. He looked up at him and saw him as he had the other night- half asleep, half dressed, with Ashley in the background sitting on a hotel bed- and suddenly everything was perfect.

Riley was the lone unremembered one of the trio. He knew more than either of them. Paul was a teacher- and married, as Riley noticed the wedding band- and Ashley was a student. Riley knew the feeling of being on eggshells around her, knowing that he could get fired for simply looking at her the wrong way. He and Paul were in the same boat.

But what if he had someone there- a little angel on his shoulder- assuring him that the school didn't care? What if he had someone telling him "hakuna matata"? Realistically, after a while, Paul might start talking to Ashley again. Thanks to his new conscience he would forget the boundaries, he would loosen up. Ashley would love it because she didn't have anything to lose, and she would feel like things were going back to the way they used to be. Soon, though, things would start to slip apart. Someone would hear the wrong thing- another teacher would misunderstand a lingering glance in the hallway between the pair. Suspicions would be murmured throughout the staff lounge- teachers and students alike would take notice. Of course he wouldn't realize this, because his new friend would promise him that it was all in his head. So he wouldn't worry about it; but then, one day, out of the blue, he would get called in to the dean's office for a private meeting. Paul would be fired and Riley would gladly accept his new teaching job.

Riley sensed this day would mark the beginning of a very rewarding friendship.

opinions?

[jill]

*cricket sounds*

so...uh...no?

[iamthemaxx]

stop it, you know people want more.............!