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Post by The Phantom Lady on Apr 3, 2012 8:56:45 GMT -5
^That is so unfair Leyla! I hope they find you an intern soon so some of that can be lifted off of your shoulders!
I'm not too happy because I was crying for 30 minutes to my doctor about my childhood earlier... we haven't even gotten into half of it yet and my next appointment is on the 24th... that's ages away and I don't feel any better, quite contrary it has brought up some grim memories
Last night, I don't know what happened but it has happened before... I got itches and my hand was raising (is that what you call it? LOL) so I asked my mother if she knew anything I could do and she blew up in my face saying she was sick of hearing of all my illnesses... well excuse me, I've heard of her back and hip all of my life and I can't ask about my hand because I was afraid it was going to cut the blood-flow to my thumb? thanks for caring!
And I finally broke my months long silence with my best friend... pretending like nothing happened I sent her a text asking how she had been... she asked why I had been silent and instead of telling her the truth, that she hurt me choosing her boyfriend she's with 24/7 over me who she hasn't seen in a while... I just explained something briefly about not being in touch with most people because I was scared of getting disappointed because it caused my attacks among other things and she got all 'Because of me? what have I done??' GRRR
Some day, when I'm strong enough and all of this is over I guess I will tell her
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Post by Cait on Apr 3, 2012 18:12:31 GMT -5
A thyroid issue hasn't crossed my mind, Leyla. I do have an aunt who has problems with hers, so perhaps that's worth looking into! Thanks! Because this anxiety came seemingly out of nowhere, so I guess I'm booking myself an appointment!
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Post by The Phantom Lady on Apr 4, 2012 13:05:20 GMT -5
I didn't get the receptionist job... Meh
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Post by bunnie24 on Apr 5, 2012 17:44:05 GMT -5
Is it possible to have TOO many job offers?
so I got my new job at Lane Bryant, but before I got this job, I was going after this other job: a receptionist position for a Chiropractor's office; and I wanted it SO BAD! However, they told me the position had been filled, so I moved on.
but yesterday, I got a call back from the doctor himself and said he wanted to do an in-person interview with me tomorrow; and I said 'yes'.
But now I"m SO conflicted *cries* I'm glad I have a job that ISN'T TJ Maxx, but this receptionist position is what I really want; and I don't want it to seem that, if all goes well, I've wasted Lane Bryant's time with hiring me.
I think the Receptionist position is full time, but he might have a heart and give me a decent part time position.
What do I do? *cries*
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Post by bunnie24 on Apr 9, 2012 18:21:25 GMT -5
sorry to be a double poster, but i've seriously been crying for about an hour; this day has just been awful!
so this weekend, I noticed that there was this obnoxious light that has been on the top of my vision since Saturday, and today I called my retina doctor and I might have to go in for surgery sooner than expected; what didn't help was that while studying for a math test today, I got kicked out of my study group cause I couldn't turn my phone off fast enough, I couldn't see my math test, and then my mom couldn't even bother to make me feel better; like it's my fault that I had a bad day.
*somebody hold me?*
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Post by The Phantom Lady on Apr 9, 2012 18:29:11 GMT -5
I'm so sorry to hear that Bunnie! I wish you had some more support! I hope everything gets better for you soon!
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Post by The Phantom Lady on Apr 11, 2012 10:22:30 GMT -5
I need some advice before I go nuts am I being too sensitive, paranoid, is it something I have done wrong? Am I being jealous? I have this friend, Rikke... we've been friends since 2006, at first she was just part of this group of 4 girls and we did everything together in school... when one of the girls screwed her over massively and I found Rikke crying (Rikke is one of he strongest girls I have known) I stepped in and took her to the movies, got her out of her apartment where she was falling into a deep dark hole, made sure she ate and I listened to her for hours giving her my advice and she still feels the need to thank me for that and as I always say, that is what a true friend should do... after that we have been so close her and I in a healthy friendship build on trust and having fun... in many ways our friendship has been a very adult friendship and I could imagine sitting at the nursing home with her laughing at something silly Our now former common friend that made her cry that day left her in turn for what is now her husband, leaving Rikke in an apartment she couldn't afford on her own, not even telling her before Rikke comes home to see her friends belongings gone and she did some much, much worse and very childish things as well and one of the nights Rikke was sitting on my bedroom floor we swore if we ever hurt the other person over a boyfriend we had the right to slap the other person... Rikke moved to Copenhagen with her sister, which is 2 hours away by train, something I can rarely afford and lately I've only seen her when she needed to get away from her sister or when one of her boyfriends broke up with her... either that or she needed a 'decent' girl to go out partying with who wouldn't get too drunk and she paid for my ticket despite my protests... we have plans on moving in together if we find a place, and I find a job... we've tried that for years now and nothing has come up... last year, when I learned the premiere date of In Time I invited her to see at my local theatre with me and she said she'd love to go... I told her in October if it wasn't September even that the date was December 1st because I know she's busy... she works on a ship and isn't off the ship for 2 weeks, then she has 2 weeks completely off work... and everything worked out... 2 weeks before the movie I sent her a text asking if she was still free on December 1st and her reply was "What have I forgotten??" after I explained what we had both agreed on, she still wanted to go and said she just had to check with the buses and that was the last I heard from her.... not until midnight the day before the movie she sent me a text 'do we still have a date tomorrow?' I just had it, and went to see the movie (completely alone, the only person at the theatre but thats another story) the next day I sent her a text back saying "Oh I didn't think you wanted to go since I hadn't heard from you so I wasn't checking my phone..." Then there was a long silence until I sent her a text asking how she was doing and she told me she was on her way to Egypt but things with her boyfriend wasn't going great and she would tell me when she came back, I told her I was concerned and wanted to help her... when I asked her about it a week after she said she was thinking of leaving him but that she couldn't because she needed to be close to someone, and she was fearing the mere thought of waking up in an empty bed Then when the doctors thought my problems were gall stones, Rikke sent me a text asking if I wanted her to go with me to the scan and I told her it was so sweet of her but it wasn't worth the 2 hour train ride each way just for that, and in the same text asking her if she wanted to find a weekend to come over and we could watch some movies together... I hadn't even set, not even suggested a date and her reply "I can't, I have to be with my boyfriend" she works with him, sleeps in his bed when they work for 2 weeks together and when they're off the ship she's with him all the time too... so why couldn't she come to see me? after that there was a month long silence, she was in London on my Birthday and I knew that (the miracle of facebook) and I never heard a word about my Birthday... she of all people know I'm extremely vulnerable about my birthday... a few weeks after my Birthday she sent me a message on Facebook asking if I was mad at her for not acknowledging my birthday... I couldn't make myself tell her I was hurt because she chose her boyfriend over me so I never replied... until a few weeks ago when I sent her an 'innocent' text asking how she was doing... she instantly asked why I had been so silent and again instead of telling her I was hurt I told her that I hadn't been in touch with too many people lately because if I got hurt I'd get a painful attack and she got very defensive... I again told her a big fat lie that it wasn't just her... am I being unreasonable? is it jealousy? ... and should I tell her how bad she has hurt me the past 6 months? I want to be her friend, I want her in my life... and should she text me in a second saying she needs a shoulder to cry on my door is always open... but what on earth should I do? I don't want to invite her to anything, I just know I'll get disappointed (EDIT: Darn that was long  ) |
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Post by wikkleshamrocks on Apr 11, 2012 11:57:33 GMT -5
sorry to be a double poster, but i've seriously been crying for about an hour; this day has just been awful! so this weekend, I noticed that there was this obnoxious light that has been on the top of my vision since Saturday, and today I called my retina doctor and I might have to go in for surgery sooner than expected; what didn't help was that while studying for a math test today, I got kicked out of my study group cause I couldn't turn my phone off fast enough, I couldn't see my math test, and then my mom couldn't even bother to make me feel better; like it's my fault that I had a bad day. *somebody hold me?* Holy crap pants Bunz.... *Massive hug* it certainly isn't your fault and you know deep inside none of it is either! I wish I could have a word with whoever kicked you out of class  phones do indeed take ages to power down, sounds like the whole planet had a strop while you suffer with your eyes. Bless ya, I know you don't wanna hear it but the sooner you get this surgery done the better! More hugs coming at ya chicky.  <3 <3 <3 |
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Post by The Phantom Lady on Apr 12, 2012 1:54:28 GMT -5
I know it's nothing but some mornings I get this cramp in my hand, and it often happens when I'm scatching my face... once I got a cut inside my ear, another time my nose and once I got a really bad cut on my cheek from my nails... had to go to a funeral and have fellow mourners ask me what happened...
I got another cut, this time not as deep but enough to make me think people are staring at me wondering who did this to me... ugh I should cut my nails short so it won't happen but I love having long feminine nails
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Post by Love Is Blue on Apr 18, 2012 19:45:20 GMT -5
My friends are not who I thought they were. I have never been good at making friends, I am not social and I am different then everyone else. I just cant seem to be good at finding people who like me for who I am. I seem to have to apologize for everything I say and it pisses me off because I DO NOTHING WRONG and my friends seem to think I am the jerk. I just don't understand why people seem trustworthy in the beginning and then stab you in the back and act like nothing ever happened. But I don't want to move on from my friends because they are the only people I have. And if I lose these ones it will just be harder to find more friends who are probably just as bad as them. Why are people such arseholes!
Sorry...I just really need a virtual hug and a bucket of ice cream...
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Post by Jinx on Apr 18, 2012 20:35:46 GMT -5
You are not alone, Love Is Blue. Big virtual hug and real love to you. Want to share a nice Ben & Jerry's with me? The cookie flavour is the best medicine for bad moments  |
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Post by The Phantom Lady on Apr 19, 2012 0:42:39 GMT -5
*BIG Hug* Blue!
Girls your age, from what I remember and see are either cool like you are or snobby... the snobs aren't worth your time and it hurts realizing that, especially when you're so young! *another hug* Its a big part of why I never had friends before I turned 16.
I am sure you will find some awesome friends somewhere and it will happen when you last expect it, someone who loves you for who you are and you don't have to change for... It can happen, despite the friend I asked for help about above (I still need help actually) I have some really cool, crazy friends who love me because I am different
I advice you right now to do everything you enjoy, watch your fave movies, have your fave candy and try not to care
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Post by bunnie24 on Apr 23, 2012 11:08:03 GMT -5
SON OF A F#%(*&#$(&^#$ B#$(&#$!!!!
It's like no matter what I do, it keeps biting me in the a$$...seriously, I started to sell the DVD's that I don't want just so I can make my credit card payment, and then I make some dollars; and today I got charged an overdraft fee because PayPal took $5 that I didn't have in my bank account out...
I just--I think I quit, I'm done!! This just keeps getting worse.
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Post by wikkleshamrocks on Apr 23, 2012 12:18:47 GMT -5
OMG Bunz *Hug* I hear ya.  It's like you do everything you can to make a positive effort to keep above water then a whole spiral of penalties come flooding in. These bank charges are effing rediculous! Can you negotiate with the bank to remove the charges? I have done that a few times with my bank. I do it about once a year and they oblige as long as I don't keep going over my Zero. I actually have just landed one and have to call them next month when they apply it. They charge about £75 just for being overdrawn 3p.  It's bloody wrong on every level. I'm paying interim money on a CC company that screwed me it's been going on for over 10 years, I lost my job through no fault of my own and lost my home too, went to a debt management thing that was good but the CC company screwed me for 6 years I had no idea of and didn't honour my agreement...money I do not owe.  No doubt your interest charges are high too. It seems the little thinks we do get shat on from a great height by a source that is lapping up the very pennies we need to feed ourselves. Try speaking to the bank and explain you was unaware of the charge that Pay Pal took out. If you have not asked this before, the bank should remove these charges. Tell them you can't feed yourself if they take the money. You poor thing I know exactly how it feels. A lot of us here do! *Extra Hug*
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Post by bunnie24 on Apr 23, 2012 18:41:59 GMT -5
I got a hold of PayPal and Ebay, but are they going to help? No...cause they're losers--so i'm going to half price books to sell all my movies/books/journals that I don't use/need/want...hopefully that'll help me better than going through ebay or craigslist...
at least HPB won't screw me over.
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)
phones do indeed take ages to power down, sounds like the whole planet had a strop while you suffer with your eyes. Bless ya, I know you don't wanna hear it but the sooner you get this surgery done the better! More hugs coming at ya chicky. 
<3 <3 <3 
It's bloody wrong on every level. I'm paying interim money on a CC company that screwed me it's been going on for over 10 years, I lost my job through no fault of my own and lost my home too, went to a debt management thing that was good but the CC company screwed me for 6 years I had no idea of and didn't honour my agreement...money I do not owe. 